Empty

We are on the way to the airport again to say goodbye to the hubby once more. I just feel numb. We have spent way too much time apart this last year and I am over having to say goodbye for another 4 months


It's hard not to get caught up in a vat of self pity. Getting sad about the husband missing Ethan's first birthday, or trick or treating with the kids, thanksgiving and all the other little things in between.

I am however so grateful that he did have more time off than we expected. We were able to squeeze in two family vacations, lots of date nights and plenty of lazy days at home enjoying each other and the kids

I hate how fast this past week went. I always want to slow down time and freeze the moments before he goes but sadly it's always as if someone hit a fast forward button.

I spent this whole week walking around the house crying at any given moment. And as our usual routine we spent yesterday avoiding and ignoring each other. Hey it works for us. And now I have a spotless house that is almost fully decorated for Halloween

I dread coming home to an empty house today and knowing that tonight I will go to bed alone. I will miss watching our shows together and rocking on the front porch after the kids go to bed and this weekend will be the worst. I hate holiday weekends when the husband is gone, when everyone else I know is spending the days together as a family.

But enough of that. My goal for the next four months is to slow down. Usually when he leaves I get so busy to help the time pass that I don't want to do that this time. If we spend a week at home in our pjs that is fine with me. As long as I'm spending time with the kiddos that is all that matters. And maybe ill finish the stack of books on my nightstand that I need to read.

At least I have the two cutest kiddos to help me pass the time when their dad is gone. And with fall coming up I have lots of fun activities for us planned.

Happy Friday everyone



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