Thursday, September 27, 2012

Being a boy mom

As I got Gianna ready for bath time the other day I couldn't help but laugh at my little nakey baby. The minute her diaper goes off her whole mood changes. She becomes this crazy little person, running around like crazy laughing at her naked self. It is hysterical. As I watched her streak around my living room a picture popped into my head of my little man doing the same thing. And all I could think about was "Oh my God, it won't be long before I have a little penis running around the house"! (Yes I said it. Penis) I have to start practicing saying it!

A picture of my little man running around naked led to the next thought in my head
Yup, I went there. Why I immediately thought of Jason Segal in a scene from Forgetting Sarah Marshall I have no idea. I of course texted the husband about my revelation and he couldn't help but laugh.

In all seriousness though sometimes I still freak myself out about having a boy. I can easily envision signing up Gianna for ballet, dressing her in tutu's and going to dance recital after recital. But what am I going to do with a boy. I'm not into sports and am such a girly girl. Can I bring up a strong, manly little boy

But part of me is excited for the challenge. Maybe having a little boy will finally get me interested in sports. I can easily picture my son and I playing lego's on the floor, running around with pirate swords and building tents in the living room and I can't wait for that.

Plus I hear little boy's are totally mama's boys. I'm warned by my friends who have girls that by the time they hit 3 the attitude sets in and they don't want cuddles or kisses from their mama. Boys on the other hand I hear want their Mama's always. It will be nice to have a mama's boy around the house since Gianna is a total daddy's girl

28 days left until my little man arrives!

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Ready to Pop

This past Sunday was my baby shower! My bff threw it for me and the theme was Ready to Pop. Def fitting for the way I feel these days.

The shower was amazing. My friends went above and beyond decorating and making my big day extra special. I am so blessed to have such amazing people in my life and baby boy is already extremely spoiled. I remember when I would go clothes shopping for Gianna and didn't think boys clothes were cute at all. Now I think they are so adorable and can't wait to dress my little man up in all the outfits we received.

The decor

Baby food game
May the force be with you
Another star wars blanket for our star wars themed nursery
My bff
The whole gang
So blessed
Ready to Pop

Monday, September 24, 2012

Happy Fall Y'all

Fall is my favorite time of year. I love everything about it.
The sight of the leaves turning colors

Pumpkin picking


Apple picking and apple cider

The decor

Trick or Treating

The activities

The clothes- how I love ugh boots, leggings and cozy sweaters

But fall in Fl looks like this

And I'll still be wearing shorts and flip flops until January at least. Oh don't get me wrong. Floridians think they have fall. Take today for instance. On the news the weather man was rejoicing over the fall weather moving in. Umm 60's at night and in the morning with 90 degree temps during the day is not Fall people. Well not to this Wisconsinite at least. Oh how I miss the cool, crisp air. The scent of a bonfire and the sound of leaves rustling in the wind.
Instead I have 90 degree temps, brown dry grass due to lack of rain and a closest full of cute sweaters and boots screaming to be worn but will sadly only be looked at. Sigh. Oh well I will still enjoy the pumpkin patch, hayrides and trick or treating with my kiddos this fall regardless of the weather!
Happy fall y'all
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Sunday, September 23, 2012

My thoughts on the RHONJ

I need to stop watching these stupid reality tv shows. They are full of nothing but classless, middle aged woman who have nothing better to do with their time and start drama. They take the meaning of the word catty to a whole new level. And yet as much as they disgust me I can't stop watching!!

So here are my thoughts On this season and the finale

Caroline- you used to be my favorite. I loved how you were all about your family and nothing else. You used to avoid drama and never took part in it. Now you are the biggest pot stirrer of them all. You are such a back stabber and gossiper. And what's worse you are bringing your kids down with you. They are growing up to be mini versions of you. Mean, rude and catty adults. And I'm sorry but you pick on Lauren for her weight have you looked at your boys lately. They are beefing up like pork chops and not in a good way

Melissa-You are def my favorite. You can't sing or dance but I do think you are honest and real. However with the whole set up thing one minute you are telling someone you don't know someone, then you are calling him by name in the bathroom and admitting you used to work for him. So own up to your past. No one cares what you did or didn't do. And did you forget your the one who called your brother and immediately turned on Teresa after she did try and tell you what was going on in the bathroom. Grow up and stop playing the victim

Teresa- you are all over the place. You can never own up to your mistakes or take responsibility for your actions. And your an awful liar. Why can't you just get along with people and stop making nasty remarks about people. This whole season I didn't feel bad for you until the end. I don't think you had anything to do with the set up. Well I hope not at least. But get a clue and leave your two timing husband. He's a douche

Jacqueline- wow, were you a train wreck this season. Every episode was like watching you on the brink if a nervous breakdown. I feet bad for you because I truly think you are a nice, sweet person and are a major people pleaser. Unfortunately that makes people walk all over you. Yes Teresa treated you horribly but I'd watch out for your sis in law. She also manipulates and uses you. I do feel you set Teresa up at the fashion show instead of trying to talk about the situation with her. But no you and Caroline sat there and texted each other like 5 year olds making stupid comments, "oh it's the calm before the storm". Umm ok yet you supposedly didn't know what the set up was or who was being set up. Whatever. Stop playing in the middle and for once stand up for yourself and be honest. And I think it's a good dies you are focusing more on your kids. That's prolly for the best

Kathy- I think you tend to be a pot stirrer but may not do that intentionally. I feel like you are very emotional and take things very personally but hey that Incan relate too. I'm the same way. I love how you always try to give people the benefit of the doubt and avoid the gossip and drama for the most part. But let's talk abut your husband, those bushy eyebrows and glasses got to go. Maybe if he didn't walk around on camera and make stupid, perverted comments that make him sound like a total pedophile they would be ok. But that's just my opinion. He needs to learn to keep his mouth shut at time!

Alright guys, there you have my rant on the housewives. What did y'all think if this season

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Friday, September 21, 2012

Fear's and biting the bullet

Like everyone else there are certain things I am afraid of. Some are small and silly, while others are major, well to me at least.

For example

-I'm terrified of elevator's. Hate having to take them. Every time I get in one I look around and locate the red button in case I get stuck in one. I have to remind myself to breathe as the watch the numbers climb from floor to floor and once the doors open I exhale in a huge sigh of relief.

-I hate thunderstorms and tonrados. Back in Wi all it took was once rumble of thunder to send me into my basement until the storm was over.Now here in Fl, with no basement's my fear has grown and I'm always trying to figure out where the safest place in my house would be if a tornado were to hit. Man I miss Wisconsin

-I'm afraid of snakes. Can't stand them. I refuse to go in my backyard in case I come across one. There is a huge river near my house that everyone goes swimming in. I had no problem swimming in river's or lakes back home in Wi but here it's a different story. You have to be careful of alligator's,water moccasins and other slimy lizards in the water. So I stay firmly on shore. My husband got me swimming in a river in NC and after we had been swimming awhile he told me to be on the lookout for water moccasins. That was it, I never swam there again.

- Sharks! I am deathly afraid of them. The minute I step foot in the ocean I am scanning the water from side to side and front to back. I usually only go in up to my knees. I'm such a baby I know. Yet although I'm afraid of sharks, I can watch Jaws over and over, I love shark week and am dying to go on this helicopter shark tour they offer in Destin. My friends went and said they saw hundred's. Yikes! I did learn a cool tip from the locals in Destin. If your on the beach and you see the lifeguard truck going back and forth at least 3 times it means a shark has been spotted and they are watching it. SO for those of you that vacation in Destin, remember that. Now I plonk myself by the lifeguard station and keep an eye out.

While these fear's may not seem significant to some, there are other things that I fear daily.

-Am I a good mom
-How will my daughter react after the baby is born
-Will she feel replaced and left out
-How will my husband handle missing the first 8 month's of our son's life
-I of course fear for my husband's safety when he is away and for my own as well
-I'm terrified of having another c-section yet the thought of labor scares me even more
-And I wander if the decisions I make in the interest of my daughter are really the best ones

Today I am going to sign Gianna up for childcare. Now I'm not a fan of daycares and childcare center's. Not because I think kids shouldn't be in them. Only because of my experiences dealing with them when I worked at the police dept. I get not all of them are bad. In fact most are pretty amazing! But due to my past experiences it took me until Gianna was a year to even put her in the nursery at church or in the childcare center at my Mops meetings. And once I did I learned she loved it! She thrives being with other kiddo's and away from me for a few hours.

The church we just started going to just opened an amazing new childcare center. State of the line, top of the art. Brand new. I love taking Gianna there when I go to church or when I go to my bible study.I can tell her and I both feel refreshed after our little time apart.

So when I saw they were offering part time childcare a few days a week I started to consider enrolling Gianna. With the husband gone at training and deploying after his training his done it will be just me with 2 kids under 2. There are no family member's to pitch in and babysit so I can get a break. No siblings or friends willing to help out. Oh I have friends here that I exchange babysitting duties with but pretty much everyone is either expecting or just had babies themselves so it wouldn't be a permanent situation.
I figured that even if I enroll Gianna one day a week, that is one day I know that I'm guaranteed to run errands with only one kiddo, catch up on cleaning and laundry while the baby sleeps, nap myself and even just to bond one on one with baby boy. All the while knowing that Gianna is in a safe and secure environment where she is being stimulated by other kiddo's her age and gets some time to herself to play and run around and not worry about waking the baby.

So the decision has been made. I'm biting the bullet and enrolling her for one day a week starting Nov 1st! Is it too early to start crying about it. I'm going to miss her so much but feel like this will be a great opportunity for her.

Wish me luck

Thursday, September 20, 2012

A letter to my firstborn

I can't believe you are 14 months old already. These last 14 months have flown seems like just yesterday you were placed in my arms for the first time and now you are little Miss Independent, talking and walking all over the place.

You have filled my life with such joy and gave me a whole new purpose in this world. I love being your mom and having you in my life has made me feel even more complete. Your dad and I love you more than we can ever say and I just hope that through the years we do a good job of telling you and showing you that every day

When I first found out I was pregnant with your brother I was sad. I felt like I was jipping you out of a childhood. I vowed that the next 9 months would be full of one on one binding time just you and I. And I failed you. Some days it took all my energy just to get outta bed and now a month before your brother arrives I'm back to feeling utterly exhausted all the time. I so wish to chase after you and run around outside playing every minute of the day but a few minutes is all mommy can handle. I feel so guilty when I turn on bubble guppies for an hour and veg on the couch while you zone out in front of the tv.

And yet you don't seem to notice. I try to fill our mornings with activities and spend as much one on one time with you as possible. No matter what we are doing though you are happy to be spending time with me. You are such a happy, content little girl and it melts my heart watching you play. You are so sweet and show such love and affection to your baby dolls and stuffed animals that I know you are going to be an amazing big sister to your brother. You are also such a cuddler. I love that every morning when you wake up you reach up to me and grab me around the neck and squeeze as tight as you can. There is no better feeling in the world.

I want you to know that after your brother arrives you are still my little girl. I will never be to busy or caught up in something to not be there for you. Nothing will change after his arrival. I never want you to feel like you are competing for my attention. Every spare moment I get will be spent with you. And while it might be an adjustment for the first few months, I know that it won't be long before you and your brother are conspiring against me. For I know the two of you will be lifelong best friends. Well I hope at least!

I love you so much baby girl. I am truly blessed to have you as a daughter. Although I wish time would slow down and you would stop growing up so fast I can't wait to create memories with you and watch you grow.

Love Mom

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Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Happier at Home

After Gianna falls asleep at night I convince myself that Im going to sit down and read instead of waste time in front of the tv and it never happens. Then I pledge that during nap time the following day I will read and again it never happens. I have a whole stack of books waiting to be read. So last week I made a big effort to turn off the tv and read.
I picked this book up from the library and couldn't wait to dive into it

I had read a review about this book that piqued my interest. Supposedly its a great read for us women who are looking to create meaningful relationships with our spouses and kids and to be happier in those areas of our lives. Who doesn't want to be a better mom and wife. I know I do. So I was excited to read a book about my two favorite topics. Marriage and motherhood

Unfortunately I could not get into this book. It's supposed to be a memoir but it read like a textbook.

The authors writing style drove me crazy. Run on paragraphs full of her opinions, quotes, research studies and statistics all taken out of context to prove her point were mind numbingly boring. The first 30 pages were like this. I could barely keep my eyes open

When she actually started talking about her own personal experiences in regards to making herself a happier mom and wife, I was Intrigued. But she would ruin those paragraphs by throwing in some stupid quote or study along with multiple definitions of words that just turned me off.

I have learned nothing from reading this book and will probably be taking it back to the library unfinished. I'm bummed because I was so looking forward to reading this book

Oh well. Anyone have any suggestions for a good read

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Midweek Randoms

As you can see things are a little different around here. I changed the name of this blog and updated my look. Isn't it amazing. So simple and clean. I love it! Although I pride myself on being a military wife I wasn't blogging so much about my experiences as a milspouse as I was blogging about my pregnancy and life as a mom. And with a one year old baby girl and  a baby boy on the way I figured that Tutu's and tonka trucks was the perfect name for this next stage in my life. Hope you all enjoy the new look!!

Now for my midweek randoms
- In exactly one month I will be meeting my little man. My c-section is officially scheduled for Oct 19th! Eek that is coming up so fast. 4 more weeks to go. Baby boy def dropped this week and I'm enjoying being able to breathe again.

- I applied for a job. I know I know.what am I thinking. I'm four weeks out from having a baby and with my husband gone and two babies at home how can I go back to work.But I'm hoping that with this job I can work part time. Barely part time. Like only one day a week. We shall see

- I think I am going to sign Gianna up for childcare. The church we have been attending opened up a brand new children's wing. They now offer part time childcare, preschool and VPK. It is a gorgeous state of the art facility. Gianna goes to childcare there on Sundays when I attend church and on Wednesday nights when my small group meets. I love the ladies that work there and Gianna does to. Even if I don't go back to work I think putting Gianna in a childcare setting one day a week for five hours would be good for her. Not to mention I'd get a little break. With the new baby coming and hubby being gone it will be nice to have one day with inky one kiddo at home. That day I can use to run errands and clean the house knowing that Gianna is being stimulated and playing with kids her own age.

- The thought of putting Gianna in childcare, even for one day a week makes me cry every time. Feelings of mommy guilt arise making me feel like the worst mom in the world. ugh

- yesterday I hosted a playdate for my Mops group. We met at this local coffee shop that has a back room full of couches and toys specifically for the local moms groups in town to meet and hang out at. The shop is run by a local church and Is completely non profit. All proceeds go to the church and their various charities and missions. Perfect right. You get to go hang out with your friends at a cute little coffee shop and still contribute towards something good in the community. Wrong! The people that work there were beyond rude. They acted like they were doing us a favor by taking our orders and they kept coming in the back room and taking the toys away from the kids. I had reserved the room for two hours and after we had been there a half hour one came back and commented on how we had better clean up our mess and that we weren't the only people that were going to use that room. I totally understand her wanting us to clean but her tone could have been a lot nicer. So my friends and I packed up our stuff, cleaned and left. I will never be going there again and I will be telling my Mops group about the horrible service and attitude of the owner and employees of this shop. Next time I will go to Starbucks

- after the horrible playdate yesterday I stopped at the Dollar tree. I grabbed a soda and a basket and went to wait by the register to be helped. No one came to help me although plenty of employees came out and saw me waiting. For over 5 mins I waited and at this point Gianna was asleep in the cart and I had 4 people behind me. Finally a man came up, walked to the register next to me and helped everyone before me. I was livid. I debated throwing two dollars on the counter for my merchandise and walking out. But since I didn't want to spend the night in jail I waited and waited. How rude are people in customer service nowadays.

- the fabric for baby boys bedding came in. Next week Tuesday a friend and I are going to spend the day sewing his bedding. I'm so excited to have the nursery feel more complete

- next weekend I will be heading down to Destin for a military wives retreat. I get to spend the weekend at the Hilton( for free) and childcare is provided. I can't wait to get away and spend some time relaxing with my friends. I figured I'd better take advantage of this retreat now before the baby comes!

And that's about it. Happy Wednesday everyone

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Monday, September 17, 2012

33 and 34 week Bumpdate

I have been slacking horribly with blogging and with my weekly pregnancy posts. Gianna is teething(for the 100th time) and for some reason this time has been the hardest for her. Poor thing. So it's been a long week in our household!

I can't believe I am already 34 weeks. My c-section is scheduled for Oct 19th! Sept 27th I go in to meet with the Dr doing the surgery. Im excited and nervous at the same time. Oct 19th is coming up fast!!

Now for my bumpdate

  • How far along?  34 weeks!!! 
  • Total weight gain:  20 lbs.
  • Maternity clothes?  Yes. I'm running out of things that fit so I wear a lot of dresses or sweat pants
  • Stretch marks? My old ones are turning pink and I've noticed some new ones crop up. I'm trying not to worry about it until after baby is born. Then I'll be sad about my once smooth stomach!
  • Sleep: I barely sleep. I'm exhausted during the day and up all night. It's awful
  • Best moment this week:  Today baby boy's material for his bedding arrived at my front door. A friend is helping me make it so I can't wait to get that done and finish decorating the nursery.
  • Miss Anything? Not really
  • Movement: Baby boy is breech of course and he is up really high. I get lots of hard punches and rolling movement in my ribs and upper abdomen area. He is a lot stronger and bigger than Gianna was at this point
  • Food cravings: Pizza, mozz sticks, donut's. You know, anything that is horrible for you
  • Food aversions: Nothing now
  • Gender: Boy.
  • Labor Signs: Lot's of braxton hicks
  • Symptoms:Horrible crotch pressure. One day last week I could have sworn I was in labor. It was awful. Heartburn, indigestion, lack of sleep, and fatigue. Some days it takes all my effort and energy just to put one foot in front of the other. Oh and terrible sciatic pain. Like to the point where I can't walk. That is one thing I never had with Gianna. I looked like a gimp taking out the garbage this morning
  • Belly Button in or out? It's flat
  • Wedding rings on or off? On today but depending on the hear some day's I have to wear my fake one
  • Looking forward to: My baby shower Sunday. I can't wait to celebrate baby boy with my friends. I also plan on heading to Target the day after to finish getting everything I need for our little man. I'm so excited. The hubs thinks I will have him early like I did Gianna so these next two weeks are going to be very busy getting everything set up and prepared for his arrival
I also have been looking for the perfect big sister gift for Gianna. Any idea's?

And now for some belly pics


Tuesday, September 11, 2012


I can't believe it's been 11 years since the horrible tragedy that took place at the World Trade Center, the Pentagon and in the air.

I still remember vividly where I was when I heard the news. I was a senior in high school, enjoying my second period study hall as a teachers aid to my biology teacher. I recall my theology teacher bursting into the room and asking to borrow the tv. He explained the news as he started wheeling over the tv to his class across the hall and we all rushed over and watched in horror as the second plane just crashed. I remember all of us thinking that it had to be a mistake. Certainly not a terrorist attack. That was something we read about in our history books, not something that could ever happen in our country

But it did. And in a way it was a loss of childhood innocence for many. No longer could we tell ourselves we were safe. There were people outside my small, private school bubble that hated Americans and wanted to hurt us. And 9/11 opened my eyes to that

I still can't watch the documentaries or news stories on 9/11 without crying. I imagine what it must have been like to hear the news of the attacks and know that your loved ones were working at or visiting the building that day. So many people lost their husbands, wives, parents, and friends in that horrible day.

But it didn't end there. The first responders of NYC rushed to the scene and started to help as many people as they could. They saves many people that day and many of them were killed themselves.

And now 11 years later our country is still fighting a war that stemmed from these terrorist attacks. How many lives have Been lost since the war has started? Too many to count

As a military wife 9/11 is so much more than a terrorist attack. It is the reason my husband is gone for long periods of time. It is the reason that I'm used to spending more time alone or with friends than with my spouse and it is also the reason I cry every time I sing the star spangled banner and see the flag being raised.

I'm proud to be an American, proud of my husband for all he does and proud of all our brave men and woman who are serving our country today

Sometimes I wish people could remember the sense of togetherness and patrioticness that they felt after 9/11 And stand behind our troops like they did back then. But I know that this war means different things to different people. And everyone is entitled to their own feelings and opinions

To me this war is in large part due to this one event. Where thousands lost their lives due to anothers hate. So let us remember and never forget this horrible tragedy. I know I never will

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Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Families and Relationships

This is part two of my post from yesterday.

I left off describing how we are slowly realizing that with the way the hub's job is, our most important priority is our family of 4. I'm sure some of you read my post and thought I sounded like a total B. I mean who doesn't want to make time for their parent's and so forth. That is not what I'm saying at all. My point is only that where once M's vacation time consisted of us going home to visit our families, we now added kids to this crazy military life style. And after they spend month's of not seeing their Dad it is important that any free time he get's he spends with them. That doesn't mean our family can't come visit, or we won't go visit them. Not at all. We both grew up close to our families, spending holiday's together, celebrating bday's and having family picnincs and bbq's during the summer. We want our children to grow up with the same sort of background and we obviously want them to be close to their grandparents. But it does mean if the hubs only gets two weeks off after being gone a year and will have to spend another 6 months away at a school or for a deployment, that those 2 weeks are reserved for our immediate family.

That being said there is a flip side to it. After watching last night's episode of Married to Jonas I was reminded of the fact that one day our kids will grow up. And they will move out of our house and start new lives of their own. When Kevin Jonas was pointing out to his mom some of the things she says that hurt his wife's feeling she said something interesting. She told him that it was easy for her to be a mom to little boys. That she was good at it and loved being their mom. But that she didn't know how to be a mom to a man who know had his own priorities and family to take care of. She explained that she spent her whole life knowing that the day would come when he would leave and start his own family, but that as much as she tried to prepare her heart she wasn't there yet.

That immediately got my thinking about my kids. I can't imagine the day when Gianna isn't snuggled up next to me on the couch. Or the day that I no longer have a baby to feed or get up with at all hours of the night. It makes me happy to think of Gianna and her brother growing up and all the memories and quality time we will spend together as a family, but it also makes me sad to think that one day they will leave the house and start their own families, possibly moving far away and only seeing us once a year. And that makes me understand our parent's even more. For I can't even imagine what it's like to see your child grow up and move away, and have to stay strong and handle only seeing your baby once a year. Because I know that when my parents look at me they see a 5 year old in pigtails playing house. And I know that I will always picture Gianna as she is now, hoarding all her stuffed animals and blankets and cuddling with me on the couch. I laugh at the fact that one day M will be the overbearing dad driving his son in law crazy and I will be the crazy MIL whose remarks may or may not be rude observations of my daughter in law.

So while the hubs and I are learning how to prioritize our family, kids, and relationship with one another, we also appreciate and understand where our parent's are coming from. After all it is their upbringing that made us into the people and parent's we are today. I only hope we can live up to the example that they set!

Hope this all made sense to everyone. I am a weepy, emotional pregnant person after all and have a lot of things running through my mind. I am however looking forward to next week's episode of Married to Jonas so I can laugh and cry with them about life as a newlywed. Who am I kidding? Although 4.5 years doesn't technically make us newlyweds some days it still feels like it. I know we have a lot to learn and I look forward to doing so for the next 80 years

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

What you can learn from Reality Tv

My newest reality Tv obsession is this show...
Now I have never been a Jonas Brother fan. I was out of the boy band craze by the time they came onto the scene, so when I saw previews for this reality show it wasn't one I added to my list. But lots of people I know have loved it and one day when nothing else was on I tuned into the first episode and was hooked. Dare I say I found a decent reality show on tv. One that isn't trashy, full of bitchy, cliquey woman or about  prostitots parading around on stage in outfits way to old for them.

As I have been watching this show I can't help but relate. For those of you that haven't seen this show it's basically about Kevin Jonas and his wife and their first years of marriage adjusting to married life. Whether it's baby talk, issues with the family or being separated while he goes on tour they have it all covered. What I love about this show is that it shows a grounded couple, one not corrupted by fame and their close knit families. I couldn't help but relate to the over bearing father(mine) or the the in-law's who make passive aggressive comments that you can't help but take as personal. After watching the latest episode I had to call up the hubby and tell him all about it and it got me thinking about when we were first married and about how our family has changed throughout these past 4.5 years. I could relate to the struggles this couple is going through as they navigate both their relationship and their relationship with their families. I could especially relate to being torn between siding with your family or supporting your spouse.

M and I didn't date long before getting married. And our dating relationship was a long distance one. Because of that we didn't get a chance to get to know, or really get close to the others family. And after we were married the hubs deployed. When he returned I moved away from our families to Nc where we were lucky if we saw our families once a year. Again that didn't give us much chance to get really close over these past few years. Now I'm not saying I don't like my in-laws. Or that the hubs doesn't get along with my parents. Not at all. I love my in-laws and am really close with my parent's. So mom's if your reading this, don't get into a huff over nothing

What I am saying is this. Since we didn't have long to build up a relationship with each others parents in the beginning of our marriage this led to a lot of conflict. For example, every time my dad comes to visit he's always fixing things, or doing things around the house. This aggravates the husband to no end. He feels emasculated and like my dad is trying to take over, or that my dad is silently accusing him of not doing enough to take care of me. I of course am so used to my dad being how he is that I would stick up for my dad and brush off my husband's feelings.

On my end I would hear things his parents would say either to the hubs or in phone conversations and feel like they were passive aggressively making snide comments. Of course the hubs would then brush me aside and say I was exaggerating. So as you can imagine discussions like that ended in a cross roads and were never solved.

However as time has passed we have gotten to know how both set of parent's are and we have a greater appreciation and understanding both for each other and for our respective parent's and inlaws. We also realized that at some point your family becomes more and more about you and your spouse and kids and less and less about your parent's. And that's just how it is. That doesn't mean you cut off your parent's from your life or have nothing to do with them. It just means that you put your spouse and kids first and your parent's second.

I know that now with the kids in our lives we will be forced to make this distinction more and more. Before M left this summer for his class he suggested going home to Wi for Xmas this year and if not then, then during his leave over the summer. I said we would have to see. I explained to him that after being gone for over 9 month's our priority should be the kids. M will only be able to spend the weekend of baby boy's birth at home, and then another 2.5 weeks with us before deploying. I feel his leave should be spent as a family of four. Not with four sets of people juggling for our time and attention back in Wi. The hubs did not agree. Until yesterday that is when Gianna had her freak out after his leaving. He's still torn up about how she cried and cried when he walked out the door. I think he finally realized what it's like to be the ones left back home. And it killed him. So today when talking we agreed that his leave is best spent taking a family vacation as a family of four. One where we can all reconnect, adjust to him being home and letting the kids  familiarize with their daddy after several long months apart. That is what has to be number 1 on our list of priorities. Funny how things change

Since this post is longer than I expected I will continue on with what else I learned from this show in relation to our family in Part 2 tomm! Thanks for reading my rambling

Monday, September 3, 2012

Miscellany Monday

I'm linking up with Clarissa over at Lowercase Letters for Miscellany Monday!
miscellany monday at lowercase letters

1. Hello September- I can't believe you are already here. This means I have one month to get everything ready for baby boy to make his arrival! I have so much to do.

2. All these post abut fall makes me jealous. It's still in the upper 90's here in Fl and last year we didn't get cooler temps until January. I miss wearing boots, sweaters, leggings and your usual fall clothes. But I live in a state where pretty much everyone wears shorts and flip flops year round. Fall here in Fl really makes me miss living in Wisconsin. The change in the leaves,  the cool crisp air, bonfires outside, I could go on forever. Oh well I am still looking forward to taking Gianna to the pumpkin patch and trick or treating with her little brother. I probably won't decorate at all this year for fall or Halloween since the baby is due so close to Halloween but I will try. It is my favorite time of year after all 

3. As I am typing this post I am watching Rugrats. At 5:30 in the morning. Why you may ask? I told a friend I'd watch her kiddos over night so and her husband could have some alone time. He deploys soon and I knew they could use the time together. The kids and I spread out blankets and pillows all over the floor and "camped" out in my living room. However at 430 I was woken up by the 4 year old who had peed everywhere. So at 4:30 I had to scrub my carpets, do laundry and give the kiddo a bath, it's going to be a long day. Her mom better be bringing me a large Pumpkin spice latte from Starbucks when she comes to get the kids 

4. I have been craving anything and everything pumpkin flavored. Pumpkin donuts, pumpkin coffee, pumpkin muffins. You name it. Since I've been at dunkin donuts every day this past week I think it's time I just go to Walmart and buy the pumpkin k-cups and creamer in order to save some money. 

5. My washing machine is on the outs. I'm hoping it lasts until the hubs comes home, which will be around Thanksgiving. I guess that means I will be cutting back in the amount of laundry I do. Shouldn't be too hard since its just the baby and I anyway

6. I am starting a new small group at church this week. Parenting 101. I'm so excited! I've never participated in a small group before and am looking forward to learning something new

7. This month is crammed full of activities that I know it's going to fly by. I have my maternity pictures, baby shower, various friends kids bday parties, and lots of activities with my Mops groups planned. I also need to squeeze in a spa day for me. This Mama needs a pedicure, manicure and her eyebrows done horribly!

That's it everyone. Happy Monday everyone

Sunday, September 2, 2012

A Glimpse into my future

After four and a half years of being a military spouse I've sort of become used to the fact that my husband is always coming and going. Don't get me wrong I hate when he leaves and miss him terribly everyday but I've learned to stay busy and get involved in things to make the time he's gone go by fast

Since having Gianna I feel it's been easier to deal with him being gone. She keeps me so busy during the day that I barely have time to take a shower, let alone think about missing the hubby until she goes to sleep at night.

Granted he's only been in training schools this past year so I am able to talk to him very night and I know he is safe. Maybe if he was deployed it would be a little harder but I think we have handled the separation well.

Until today that is. The hubs was able to come home for the weekend after previously being told he'd be unable to come home. And we made the most of the two days he was here. Gianna loved having her daddy home. She was in constant show off mode and watching her snuggle with her daddy every night melted my heart. I know how hard it is for him to be away. Both him and her needed the time together. Especially since the next time he comes home we will be a family of 4!

The past few times the hubs has left Gianna didn't really know what was going on. Today though was different. Hubby had been holding her saying goodbye and the minute he put her down she flipped out. Screaming hysterically and grabbing at his legs. He picked her up again and held her for a few more minutes. Then put her down only to have her freak out again. At this point both G, M and I were on tears. She did not want her daddy to go. Again he put her down and started for the door. She followed and I picked her up so he was able to leave. I don't know what was worse watching my daughter cry and reach for her dad or seeing the hubs leaving in tears.

I scooped up Gianna and carried her to the couch where she finally fell asleep in my arms. After about an hour she woke up and immediately started walking around the house calling out for her daddy. She won't put down the bear he made her for her birthday and she looks for him every time I open a door in the house or leave the room

I know that as time goes on his comings and goings will get harder and harder. Especially on the kids. It will be a few years before they are able to comprehend what is going on and until then all they know is that daddy is leaving. And as hard as it is I have to stay strong for them and the hubs.

I shed a few tears during Gianna's nap time but now I have to be strong for her. So off I go to give her lots of extra hugs and kisses today hoping to ease he transition until she sees her daddy again

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Saturday, September 1, 2012

Labor Day Weekend

The hubs was able to come home this weekend and since this is his last weekend home before the baby is born we have been very busy!

Yesterday we went to Pensacola. My parents had bought Gianna one of those cozy coupes for her birthday and when we put it together it was missing pieces. So we went to exchange it, then took Gianna to Barnes and nobles and enjoyed dinner out. After returning home we put the car together and took it for a test drive

Today we enjoyed a lazy morning and as soon as Gianna went down for a nap we got to work. Well the hubs did while I supervised. He put together baby boys rock n play, the double stroller and the car seat. Plus we cleared out the nursery, organized his clothes and vacuumed so the room will be all set for when the furniture is delivered Tuesday.

This is like the Ford Flex of strollers. I think I may need a Wide Load sign and camera to help me navigate this thing

I can't believe in 8 weeks we will be a family of 4!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone