And I don't mean productive in the way that I wish I got more accomplished. I accomplish plenty of errands, cleaning and cooking on the weekends. I do wish however that they were filled with more quality time with the hubby
During the week we wander around our house as two individuals. We get up at different times, leave for work and return home at different times. He beats me home by three hours and has plenty of time to relax and play his playstation games. I however don't get home until after 7, get dinner ready, clean and don't get a chance to sit down until 9ish where I force the hubby to watch an hour of reality tv. After that it's off to bed. Some nights I try to convince the hubby to watch a movie or drink a glass of wine or two before bed but usually he just wants to relax and will read a book while I watch tv. And I can't blame him. So when the weekends roll around I try to cram as many activities into them as possible.
However we have different ideas about ways to spend our weekends.I want the weekends to be time spent with the hubby. I feel most connected to him when we get out of the house and engage in some sort of activity. This Sunday we drove up to raleigh, did some shopping and went out to lunch. It was so nice to get away from the sound of guns blaring over the play station, the ringing telephone and the apt for a day. We talked, we laughed we had a blast. However once we were back home we assumed our spots on separate couches and tried to watch a movie before one of us got bored and picked up a book to read and then we headed off to bed. Monday I wanted to get outta the house too but M wanted to stay in. We ended up vegging the day away each doing our own thing. And while I loved having the day off work and being able to lay around all day I was left with the feeling that we should be doing something. Once the week starts we become so busy with our routine and get so caught up in things we hardly have time for the other. So why is it on weekends we still don't make the time for each other.
Does anyone else feel this way. In a way I feel like I'm overreacting. We do try to make plans and by the time the weekend rolls around we don't feel like following through on our plans. So I know I can't complain. I just wish the weekends were filled with more us time
My husband and I are the same way! It seems like we are always on different schedules. When he gets home from work and on the weekends I just want to spend time with him, but he typically wants to relax and have his alone time playing Xbox or something. I have a bad back and can't sit down in a chair or on a couch so I have to eat in bed and all that fun stuff so now we don't even get to eat dinner together. He watches his shows in one room and I watch mine in the other. We meet at bedtime.
ReplyDeleteWhen the weekends roll around and we talk about what we're going to do we end up not doing them and our plans become instantly boring. lol. Since our baby is due in about 7 weeks I want to make sure we enjoy each other's company now. I know things won't be the same once little Ava gets here. I just wish I could come up with more things for us to do together! We only have a few friends in the area now (since he's in the Air Force and we just moved here this year) so it can be hard to make plans to go out and do anything fun.
I guess what I'm saying is don't feel alone in this! We're the same way and we're still newlyweds! We just have different things that we enjoy and sometimes its just better for us to do our own thing so that we don't get frustrated with being forced to watch or do something we don't want to. I wish that we could have more quality "us" time, but I know that this is what works for us and I think I'm ok with that. :) Don't get discouraged. Just make sure the time you do spend together is fantastic!
Good luck with everything!
I don't work, but when the husband has the day off or the weekend rolls around, I want to get out of the house and spend time as a family... or if we're lucky, get a sitter so he and I can go to lunch or dinner without telling one of the kids to "sit down" or "stop that" or "do you mind?" But he just wants to sit around the house and not do anything and it drives me mad.
ReplyDeleteI think this happens a lot when a deployment ends. He's used to doing his own thing and we're used to doing our own thing. It's difficult after a year of being away to mesh the two lives together. What if you suggested that he cook dinner (can he cook?) so it will be ready when you get home. This will give you guys more time to spend together. Make it be your thing - he cooks, you clean, then take the dogs for a walk. Whatever will get you two spending time together. Now that things are settling into a pattern, you'll be able to figure out what will work for both of you in meeting your needs.
ReplyDeleteSorry, for sounding like a therapist....if you have time (haha) check out the books Love & Respect and the 5 Love Languages. They are great in helping identify what he needs and what we need.
greeting! I just found your blog, and my boyfriend and I have a similar situation during the week. He gets home so much earlier than me, I get home and get dinner started/try to work out and all of a sudden it's pat 8:00!! We always eat dinner sitting at the table, tv OFF to catch up... but we always make the weekend work too. bless those weekends! I'm in the same boat, counting the days til Friday at 9 a.m. on Monday!
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