Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Parenthood and keeping your cool

We are in the midst of the terrible two's around here and boy are they terrible. For lack of a better word. Overnight my sweet baby has disappeared. Everything is a constant power struggle, temper tantrum or an act of defiance. I texted the hubby the other day telling him he would be coming home to a drink wife and  a messy house! (I'm just kidding. The extent of my drinking is one glass of wine a night) But that's how I felt after dealing with a screaming baby and a tantruming toddler all day long.

Discipline and structure are things I really need to work on around here. Gianna is the type of kid who doesn't respond to time out's, spanking or scolding. I am at my wits end at the best way to discipline her and yet I don't want to break her spirit or change who she is as a person. At the end of the day she is a toddler, a not a tiny adult or a mini person. A child, whose brain is struggling to comprehend all the changes it is going through. All these emotions she is feeling, along with things she is learning and discovering on a daily basis is a lot for a child to process and I know that is where the majority of the tantrums come into play. I've been searching for the best book or resource on parenting toddlers. I know there I'm not going to find a hand book out there that tell me how to handle every situation I encounter. But pretty soon I am going to have two toddler's under my roof and I want to know how to be prepared. While researching books I found some amazing parenting quotes on Pinterest and decided to share them with you. Because while I find myself getting frustrated multiple times a day on a daily basis I need to give myself grace and remind myself that Parenting isn't supposed to be easy. And my toddler isn't supposed to act like an adult. And this stage will soon pass.;



.

There are going to be days and moments where I do lose my cool with my kids. But at the end of the day I have to remember they are watching my every move. I can't expect them to stop throwing a tantrum or to calm down if I am screaming and losing my cool as well. I have to be the one to stop, take a deep breath and deal with my child's behavior head on. Like an adult instead of acting worse than a 2 year old. And I always have to remember to give myself and them grace. For no one is perfect. Especially myself

But in terms of toddlers and tantrums. Any discipline advice, parenting resources or anything at all you guys can recommend? Any input would be much appreciated

4 comments:

  1. Well, I have 6 children and my current 2 year old is probably the most challenging I have ever had! He was throwing tantrums which was something I had not experienced before. I find he does well if I
    1. Take him outside to play ASAP in the morning.
    2. Am firm and calm with my reactions to him. "No, you may not have another pretzel" and then stick to it!! I was giving in and it was feeding it so bad!
    3. Feed him healthy food. Self control is hard enough for these little guys without adding sugar ;).
    4. Really, really limit TV.
    5. Have realistic expectations. He needs to play and move a lot. He needs me to talk to him and tell him what's going on.

    I hope you can enjoy this sweet phase even with all the emotions these little ones have!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I can totally relate! So hard to remain calm, yet so important. I make many, many trips to the bedroom for time out, which is hard with a little one needing attention as well. I don't want to rush days, but some days I am ready for a new season.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Love on the pictures on parenting. Those were great reminders of what this challenge in our life really means. I have a daughter who just turned 5 so I understand the difficulty and frustration. It either brings me to tears or makes me want to scream and pull my hair out. It helps to literally take a few deep breaths. Count to 10 before doing or saying anything. A lot of times they just don't know how to control their emotions and need to be listened to. As for discipline this is my biggest weakness as I am a softy and have a very passive and dismissive personality. My daughter is very strong willed and challenges everything I say. She needs to be reminded who is in charge and that I do things out of love. I find explaining reasons for things helps a lot. Consistency is key, if she can get away with it once she'll remember that. Time outs do not work for her at all, what works the best is taking something away from her. Not letting her watch tv for the whole day. Take away her favorite toy. If she throws a toy, it's taken from her for the day, etc. And big rewards for things. Eating all her food equals a piece of chocolate or fruit snack. Extra reading or tv time or trip to the playground. Big hugs and big smiles and big words of praise. :) Keep up the good work :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. i am SO far behind in all aspects of blogging but have loved keeping up with you via IG and FB, so in attempt to soak up all of your (wonderfully written as always words) i am going to spend some time scrolling thru all of your posts from the summer and fall this far--- expect a lot of comments! for this post... i am SO with you on the tough days of a two year old!!!

    ReplyDelete