Thursday, March 25, 2010

Day 3 and a shout out!!

It's been three days since M left and it still hasn't sank in yet. Yesterday as I pulled into our apartment complex I saw M 's car in his usual parking spot and I thought to myself, yay M's home from work early. Then I realized that it was I who had parked his car there and that he wouldn't be home for another 3-4 months. These past few days I have been walking around with that empty feeling in the pit of my stomach. I don't feel like doing anything besides sleeping or reading a good book but when I try to do either of those I can't. I haven't slept more than two hours a night and every time I try to read a book my mind wanders. It doesn't help I am stressed with the idea of taking two exams before next week and can barely find the time for studying.

But that's just me venting. You would think with the way I'm acting that we had never gone through a deployment before but in fact we went through a 9 month one and spent the better part of a year apart. It's amazing, how fast time goes.It seems like just yesterday M was getting home and I was settling down here in NC. This past year just flew by and the deployment became nothing more than a distant memory. I remember having a discussion with M a few months after he returned home about reenlisting. M's response was let's see how you like being an army wife after I leave all the time. You see M is in a unit that although they don't deploy for longer than 9 months, they deploy more frequently than most. M is already set to deploy for 3 months around September and then again in January. I have a feeling I will have to get used to being alone.

Next year I will also experience our first PCS. M's unit is set to move to Florida!!! Now I love Florida, that's where my family vacation's and that's where M and I were married. I can't wait to move. Our problem though is this, by the time we move M will only have a year left. This will put him at the 10 year mark at the age of 33. Should he reenlist or not. I'm hoping he will but know that I am being selfish in my decision. This will have to be left up to M and M alone. I may have to endure separations but I am not the one being deployed to a war zone fighting for my life. So we shall see. When M get's back we have some big decisions to make. In the meantime though I am going to enjoy thinking about moving to Florida!!

And also don't you guys just love my new layout. My good blogger friend Mrs. Muffins did it for me. Isn't she amazing and she had to deal with picky, indecisive me! I love her even more for that. Mrs Muffin's has designed a bunch of other blogger layouts and they keep getting better and better. Thank you so much for creating and installing my layout. I just love it!!


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13 comments:

  1. I noticed your layout the other day. She also did Rachel's (A little pink in a world of camo) blog, which I equally love, as well as her own of course. I'm going to enlist her for a fancy schmancy blog design after K is home and we've gone to Florida on vacation so I have some pictures of us for it that I like :)

    I've often wondered if shorter but more frequent deployments would be easier or harder. I think I actually prefer the longer ones, because you get more time to get into a groove, instead of a constant "here, you can have him.. ok, are you used to him? yeah? well we're taking him back again."

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  2. Aw Ifeel your pain although my husband left monday for basics I won't see him until May and maybe even July. I miss him so much I can't sleep at night either its really weird to because I wake up at 4 every night and I can't go back to sleep so I have major bags under my eyes and I look bad but I have this emptyness in my stomach that I can't feel and I think its because I can't see or even talk to B but I know that he is okay and I can't wait till May so I'm just trying to keep busy until then...

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  3. Like you, I feel that the decision is ultimately his to make. Although, it is your life too and your opinion should be considered.. He's already at the half-way point of being able to retire out of the military, why not go for it? :)

    I do love your layout! Mrs. Muffins is definitely talented. I considered having her make a layout for my blog, but being that I am majoring in Web Design, I figured I should try to make my own and see how it turns out.. Haha!

    Have a great night!

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  4. I believe my husband might be assigned to the same unit as you guys. Or at least he will eventually.

    You're still more positive than I am this early in a deployment. I stink at positivity when he leaves.

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  5. Your blog looks FANTASTIC!

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  6. You sound like you are doing great...keep it up! I have been thinking about you! 3 days down...wooohooo!!!!

    Like you said, once he is home, this deployment will be a distant memory...that is the crazy part!

    The blog looks awesome! :)

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  7. I did the same thing with the car last time my husband left.

    We have done 2 really long deployments and had a year break in between and now another one coming up. I am not sure what is easier. Deployments are just hard.

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  8. I love your blog makeover :) looks super super cute :)

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  9. Thank you for becoming one of my followers! I love making new friends, especially other women in military relationships! :)

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  10. Loving the blog. Deployments never get easier, hope your in good spirits! =]

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  11. You can rock this deploment, lady. No worries.

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  12. Oh we love Florida too! It sounds like at some point (whether its where you are now) or Florida we could end up at the same post! Yay!!

    I totally understand it not sinking in yet. At some point in the not so distant future he'll be home and it will seem like this deployment never happened.

    Oh, and your blog looks great! I'm going to email you back during naptime tomorrow :)

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  13. I feel your pain, girl! My husband just left for a year long deployment a few weeks ago. It's hard being away from the hubby...anyways, just thought I'd drop a note, leave some love :) I'll be reading along, I like to read other army wife blogs since there aren't so many here where I live.
    xx
    Ashleigh

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