Last Year

Last year as all the fall festivities approached I celebrated them with some trepidation. As the first few days of October crept by I found myself wanting to stop time.

In a few weeks my baby boy would be born, and my current baby would no longer be the baby of the house. 

At just 15 months of age, her world was going to change

I know, melodramatic right

But those last few weeks with her were so special and I was afraid of the change that a new baby would bring

Would Gianna feel left out, abandoned, swept aside, replaced. At such a young age how could she fully comprehend what was about to happen

As much as I wanted my baby boy I wasn't ready for things to change

I worried that by bringing a new baby home when she was still a baby that somehow I would damage her forever. That our heart to heart connection would be changed from there on out

I couldn't imagine life with two, nor did I think it was possible to love another child as wholly and completely as I loved Gianna.

This past weekend I took both kids to the same pumpkin patch I spent my last weekend with Gianna before Ethan was born

As we pulled in I felt a rush of emotions. Remembering that last weekend and also missing the feel of my baby boy in my belly

As I unloaded both my kids and did all the same things I had done a year prior I couldn't help but stop and give thanks. For I knew then that I have never been more blessed.

If I could go back to a year prior I would tell myself to stop worrying, enjoy every second but know that by adding another that things would only get better. I would be able to love harder and more than I ever thought possible and as I sat enjoying the hay ride with my babies, watching the sun gleam over their excited faces, seeing the grins spread across their faces when we got to the pumpkin patch

 I knew that this was bliss. I blinked back tears as I climbed out of the wagon, and enjoyed the day with the two who are the most important things to me

Thank God for my sweet babies

Oh, how I love this time of year

 Making memories and carrying out traditions is so important to me and I look forward to creating many more memories and carrying out our yearly traditions

Halloween 2012

Fall 2013