Thursday, June 28, 2012

Can a mom catch a break?

After nine months of pregnancy full of horrible migraines and constant vomiting which ended with a breech baby and a c-section followed by countless sleepless nights, (cause heaven forbid the hubs get up and help with the baby) I now have a 11 month old who walks around the house saying DaDaDaDa!

Seriously am I chopped liver. You would think that since I'm home all day with her, playing with her, changing her and taking her to different activities that mama would be her first word. Nope dada is. I'm not even close to getting a mama outta her. Life is so unfair isn't it!

And of course the pregnant hormonal person that I am right now can't help but take it personal. Maybe she's mad at me that I'm making her a big sister so soon. Maybe she can sense that in a few short months her life will be turned upside down with the addition of a baby brother and a dad who will be gone for countless months. Is she punishing me for disrupting her peaceful life. One where she's the center of attention and spoiled to death

But I know that's not the case. Or at least I try to tell myself that. I know she won't remember her baby brother being born and I've heard that with kids close in age they grow up to be best friends. I so hope that's true.

But part of me feels guilty. I look at her and watch her playing by herself, every so often she stops and smiles at me and either waves or walks over to show me the toy she is playing with and I feel a tug on my heart. I love her so much and can't imagine loving anyone more. I'm so afraid after the baby is born she will feel neglected or abandoned. But then I force myself to stop thinking so negatively and to just stop thinking at all and enjoy the moment of mother and daughter time. Even though she is screaming dada into my ear

As time goes by quickly I plan to spend these next few months spending as much quality time as possible with baby girl. And once baby brother makes his arrival I don't intend to stop spending any quality time with my little girl.

And hopefully soon she will start saying Mama


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3 comments:

  1. My kids were the same way. Hopefully I can convince the 4th to say mama first. :)

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  2. If it helps, the feeling goes both ways! I got our baby to say "Mamamamama" and that's all she does now. My poor husband feels kinda sad!

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  3. My kid is Doggie first, Daddy second, and Mama if she absolutely has to...I rank very very low in our house.

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