When the discussion of reenlisting was brought up before I would always shout out a loud "Reenlist"! I love being an army wife, I love this military lifestyle and I'm so proud of my hubby for everything that he does. And the reenlistment bonus isn't such a bad thing either!! We could pay off our debt, buy a house at our next PCS station, be financially stable for kids, etc, etc. Not to mention the job security, health insurance and pension a career in the military would allow. I know I can handle deployments, we've gone through 2 already and have another one coming up within the next few months. I also know how good at my job my hubby is, how much he loves it and I don't want to tell him to get out and later on have him resent me
But lately I've been having second thoughts. It all started when I watched Army Wives the other night. The thoughts of the hubby deploying back to Afghanistan scares the shit out of me. M already has lost a best friend, witnessed countless IED explosions and had a guy get shot standing right next to him. His last two trips to Afghanistan were horrible. I got daily emails and phone calls about the loss of life within his unit. It's amazing what you can forget after awhile. But while watching Army Wives all those memories began to resurface. How can I tell my husband to reenlist and to send him back there. It's not like 15 years ago when there wasn't a war going on. Now being a military spouse literally means sending your husband off to war. Repeatedly. How can I do that again?
In the end I know we will weigh the pro's and con's and have several discussions about the topic. However I feel like I shouldn't have that much say in the matter. I feel that the decision should be left up to him. I'm not the one going off to war, I'm the one that stays behind. So to all you milspouses out there, do you and your hubby's have this conversation. How did you decide to either stay in or get out? I'd love to hear from y'all
This is all natural. Jarrod actually reenlisted TODAY. A long time ago, he said he couldn't see himself doing anything else, and with two deployments under our belts, deploying doesn't scare him...but after his last one to Iraq, it scares ME. A lot. Kosovo didn't do much to him at all, but when he came back from Iraq, there were issues that needed to be handled and are still being handled. It's a really scary thing. I wish I had some great advice for you, but you really just have to weigh your options. If he DOES reenlist, this is what will happen or could happen. If he doesn't reenlist, what will he do? You guys will figure it out!
ReplyDeleteP.S. What's your Twitter name again? I made a new account. My name is captivatedx. :)
In regards to my last comment: my username is labarndt86. I didn't know I could change my username mid-use, and felt too teenybopper with the 'x' in my other name...haha.
ReplyDeleteWe have also been having this discussion alot lately. Even though reenlistment is two years away for us also, my husband is already stressed out about which choice to make! Everyone and their momma is telling my husband to reenlist since he only has 10 more years to retire. Retiring at 38 and all the benefits that come along with it sounds great, but I just keep thinking about all the deployments we will have to go through to get to that point. Sometimes I just feel like the risk and the stress it puts on our marriage won't be worth it..
ReplyDeleteWe are having the same conversation...except my hubby has less than a year until he gets out so I'm feeling stressed about needing to make a decision. Mostly, I am leaving the ultimate decision up to him. It is his career and I want him to be happy with whatever choice he chooses. I like being an army wife too (for the most part), but when I encourage him to say in, I always worry about future deployments and what might happen. The uncertainty is scary!
ReplyDeleteTrust in Him. He will direct your path. Loves!
ReplyDeleteWe have been talking about this daily all summer. He's already done 10 years and he could potentially retire at 40. This last deployment was awful, and he's suffering from PTSD and a TBI. It's a hard decision to make. All we hear from everybody is, it's only 10 more years, but they are civilians. They don't understand that that could mean 8 more deployments. We're having a really hard time already and his contract isn't even up until Dec 2012. I can't tell him to get out because it's his life. He's wanted to be a soldier since he was in elementary school. i can't say stay in either because of all the obvious reasons. *sigh*
ReplyDeleteWe're hitting that cross roads too, except we're far from the half way point. re-enlistment is the plan for now because of the bonus and secure job but it's always tough to think of deployments and where ever we may end up next.
ReplyDeleteTotally feel ya! My husband hasn't reached the 10 year mark, but he's getting close. He's determined once he reaches that 10 year mark that he will re-enlist. It's hard to wrap my mind around not only 1 but several more deployments after that point...
ReplyDeleteIt really seems like I was just reading yesterday about his homecoming! And he has to leave again so soon? =(
ReplyDeleteIt's a tough decision to make. My husband just hit his 10 year mark in June... and when it comes time and he's able to reinlist, he's going to do it. As much as I would love for him to get out and us live a NONDEPLOYABLE life together, in this economy we wouldn't be able to afford to...
M can always request to go to a nondeployable unit for 3 years when he reinlists. He can also talk to his branch manager and see what options are available for his next PCS.
It's tough choice, but I know you guys will make the right one that works best for you guys =)
Your timing couldn't be better. My husband has been in the Navy for 10 years and we just made the decision to re-enlist. I will be writing a post about it soon, but just weigh the pros and cons. Does he enjoy what he does? Is it worth the cons? Money helps, but it isn't everything...you still have to survive the day-to-day. If he got out, what would he want to do? Can you handle more deployments or is it just too much? You both have to discuss it and BE HONEST. With him and with yourself.
ReplyDeleteJust like everyone else, this is something Steve and I have been talking about. He's only been in a few years though, but being gone so much has been tough on him. Honestly, I think that he's a lifer, and I think he'll enjoy it more once we're actually living in the same place.
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