Hello my fellow bloggers!
I have arrived safely in Winston Salem and am awaiting the start of my conference. Since I packed along my cute little netbook I decided what a perfect time to post!!
I had another idea planned for today's post but a facebook message I received last night made me change my mind about today's post.
So remember a few days ago I posted about how I was unable to purchase a bridesmaids dress for a friend's wedding. If not I will quick recap. My friend is getting in married in July 2011. She emailed us last week saying we needed to purchase the dress she found since it is being discontinued in two weeks. I wrote her back and said I couldnt purchase it at this time as I had just dropped a grand on a new phone, my work conference which is mandatory and money for my cousins bridesmaid dress which is this July. I also have to limit my spending as I am a 1099 employee so in about a few weeks I have to write a big fat check to uncle Sam.
Well this past Sunday she asked if I purchased the dress. I told her I did not and again told her why I was unable to do so and asked her if she could purchase it and I would pay her back in about a month or if I could wait until March to purchase it. She asked for my measurements which I figured meant she would be purchasing it for me. Well last night I get a facebook message from her which states that she didn't bother calling me since I'm always busy with work but that she is sorry that she has to cut back on her wedding party and has one too many girls in her wedding. She then states she feels bad for doing so but she should have figured out how many people they needed to stand up before asking. She finished the message by asking me to respond so she knows I received the message.
Now we were bff's all through out college, sorority sisters and roommates but in the past few years had lost touch a little. WE also live 1400 miles apart. I was honored to be in her wedding and even told her this past week that the only reason I couldn't get the dress at this time was because of taxes so when I received this message my feelings were hurt. Then I became angry. Why did she message me this on facebook? She couldn't have called. I called our other roommate who also was unable to afford the dress at this time and asked if she had heard from her. Nope she is still in the wedding
I then became angry and the immature side of me wanted to email her and tell her that at the age of 26 she should grow up, get a job and move out of mommy and daddy's house and that once she entered the working world and started paying rent she would see how hard it is to expect someone to pay for a dress when you only give them two weeks notice. I then also wanted to tell her that if she wanted to pay my taxes for me, all $5,000 of them then I would gladly buy the dress
But then I realized that it is best to say nothing at all. Clearly she did not want me to be a part of her wedding and was upset that I couldn't order the dress. There is no point in arguing with this girl or making the situation worse. It is her wedding and she is the bride(zilla). Just kidding. I'm sure you all can see both sides of our situation. I just wished that she would have had the decency to call or at least email me this instead of face booking me. I know that after this our friendship will probably never be the same so I am going to let it end quietly and not cause a fuss. If this girl was someone I was really close too I would have asked my parents for the $80.00 for the dress but since she wasn't I didn't feel a need to do so. Part of me thought that my friend would understand my circumstances, since if you don't pay the government they take things away!! But maybe we were both just holding on to a past friendship that ended years ago. We saw each other through the ups and down of college, relationships, moving out on our own for the first time and we shared everything together. Things changed after graduation as they always do and our friendship wasn't the same. My hubby is always telling me that I am at that awkward age. I don't have as much in common anymore with my unmarried college friends. I am a little too old to spend my nights drinking and partying with friends, not only because I am married but because I now have a career instead of a job, rent and student loans to pay instead of splitting rent with 3 girls and a husband to take care of. I am now officially an adult. I am also in the in between stage where our friends are starting to have babies. I myself am at a crossroads to pursue a master's degree or start having children. In a week I will be 26. It is hard to believe how my life has changed these past two years but I would never change it for anything.
So maybe part of me expected this message from her and was shocked when she even asked me to be in the wedding. As sad and hard as it is I will see the end of this friendship like a mature adult.
Do y'all think I should respond to her or just leave things be?
Thanks for listening to me vent