Wednesday, April 23, 2014

The Real Military Wives of Blogland

Although I already posted today I saw this going around the blogsphere and had to link up. When I first started blogging it was to connect with friends and family back home and also as a way to meet other military wives. Since I've had the kiddo's I feel like I've lost a lot of my old followers and I post less and less about this crazy lifestyle. And I miss that. So here I go. Cant wait to connect with more mil-spouses again. Thanks Samantha and Mallory for starting this
Mal Smiles
Hello! My name is Katie and I am originally from Milwaukee, Wi. I met my husband through my now SIL. I was working at my local police department where my SIL worked. She had set up a Myspace account to communicate more with her brother. He was in the army and currently deployed in Afghanistan.Since he and I were her only friends, we jokingly became friends. We started talking online and when he came up to WI for a weekend after his deployment ended we hit it off. We continued talking after he returned to Ft Bragg, NC where he was stationed and a month later when his leave started he once again returned to WI. We fell, hard for each other and spent every second together. We went on a trip to Vegas, then to Key West and the rest was history. We were engaged a month later and returned to Key West to get married. 5 months after we first met. It was a whirlwind and little did I know that it was only getting started
My husband deployed a month after we were married for a total of 9 months. I stayed in WI where I continued to work at the police dept and where I was also going to school for my master's in Special education. Those 9 months were horrible and the D word was thrown around numerous times. However when he returned home from his deployment we knew that what we had was worth fighing for. When his leave started we finally took our honeymoon and then I packed up my stuff, said good-bye to my family and lifelong friends and moved to Fayetteville, NC where the husband was stationed.
I got a job as a Behavioral Therapist working with kids who have autism and we slowly adjusted to married life and finally living together.
About 1.5 years after our first deployment ended he left again for a short tour in South America. I kept busy with work and school but one thing was for certain. We both knew that when he returned it was time to expand our family. In Nov of 2010 we found out we were expecting our first baby. He deployed again when I was only 9 weeks along and returned when I was 25 weeks along. A few weeks after that we made our first PCS move to Crestview, Fl where he is currently stationed
Our first baby was born in July and I became a SAHM. The husband was in and out for training and when our daughter was 6 months old we found out we were expecting again. Irish twins. Babies 15 months apart. But that wasn't even the hardest part
Right before we found out we were pregnant with baby number 2 we made the decision to reenlist. Adding 6 years to the hubby's time would put us at 16. So basically we made a commitment to this military life for the long haul. The husband also decided to turn in his warrant office packet and was accepted.
So a week before our daughter turned 1 the husband headed back to Ft Bragg to start the warrant course.
I enjoyed time with our daughter and prepared for our new baby boy. Luckily I was set to have a repeat C-section so the husband was able to make it home in time to welcome our baby boy into the world
We were now a family of 4. When Ethan was 2 days old the husband left to finish the warrant course and was officially promoted a few days after Ethan turned a month old. The hubby returned home, spent two weeks with us and left for Afghanistan. Life with 2 under 2 is hard, add to that the stress of a deployment and there were many days that I felt like I was swimming under water and struggling to get by. But as time passed things got easier and it was time for the hubby to return home
After 10 months away the hubby was finally home. We loved having him home with us though adjusting to life as a family of 4 was def a huge transition. And of course after 4 months home, duty called and the hubby left to go TDY for 4 more months. He returned home right before Christmas and left again in the beginning of March for another deployment.
So it's just me and the kids again counting down that days till daddy comes home.
This lifestyle can be hard. Very hard. And unless you are living it you have no idea what it's like. I've had plenty of people say, Well, you got yourself into this. What did you expect? Or the blank stares when I explain I'm a SAHM. It all boils down to this
My husband is always gone. In the last 3 years he has been gone 2.5 of it. Nothing could have ever prepared me to spend more than half my marriage apart from my husband. Or to have to raise two kids without their daddy most of the time. It's hard to co-parent when you can only talk to your spouse 20 mins a day. If that. It's hard to celebrate birthday's, holiday's, anniversaries, etc by yourself year after year. It's hard to miss someone so much and to hear your daughter tell your son that "Daddy doesn't live here anymore"
So no, I didn't know what to expect. And I find that 6 years into this lifestyle with 5 deployments under my belt on top of numerous TDY's that the time apart doesn't get easier, it only gets harder
I have learned though that with each deployment we get better and better. We communicate better and learn more and more about the other. We also become stronger as individuals and learn not to take time together for granted
And while this lifestyle isn't easy  it also has given us so many opportunities. And an amazing sense of pride. Pride for our country, for all the men and women who serve and for my husband. As hard as it is staying home and raising 2 little one's without their dad, my husband is the one that has to leave us. He spends days and months apart from his family, sacrificing the daily luxuries that everyone else takes for granted. He does it for us, but he does it because he loves his country and believes in what he does. He is the most hard working man that I have ever met and he's dang good at his job. I couldn't have picked a better man to spend my life with and the kids couldn't ask for a better dad.
Life in the military is always changing and never predictable. But I'm along for the ride, through thick and thin and I can't wait to see where this life takes us


  1. Just found you from the link up and god bless you for living through all these deployments with your little ones! I have 3 boys (the oldest will be 5 next month) and my husband leaves in 3 weeks. I am dreading it but your positive attitude is certainly uplifting!

  2. You have dealt with so much in the past few years, and it really is uplifting to hear how positive you are. Even if we did know what we were getting into as a military wife, nothing could prepare us for the actual journey!

  3. you are one of the strongest mommas i know! i love your story and you manage to always have it together and youre not afraid to make it heard when times are tough.