The hubs and I have always said we wanted a big family. We got married both think we wanted no kids and changed that to wanting 4 kids. After Gianna was born as we held our newborn baby girl in an euphoric state of bliss we jokingly asked each other, Ready for another?
When Gianna was a few months old we actually sat down and discussed when we wanted to try for another. We both agreed to wait until she turned one. The hubs would have another right away but I wanted to wait. After the hubs left at the end of January I did some more thinking on the subject and I decided I wanted to wait until she was 2. Every moment with her is amazing and watching her grow has been so exciting. She will only be our only child once and I wanted a few years to spoil the heck outta her. In face I even though about waiting until she was 3-4 before having our second kiddo
Well God has other plans doesn't he because after buying a pregnancy test on a whim, we found out we are expecting baby number 2. Yup cue in shock and disbelief. I have a 7 month old and am pregnant again. This is so now how I wanted it to happen
I didn't even think it was possible due to breastfeeding and all but like they say it only takes one time. I had gotten my period once since having Gianna at the beginning of January. When I missed it I thought it was due to breastfeeding and wacky periods. But this past weekend I had a few drinks and wanted to make sure my missed period was due to hormone levels fluctuating and not a pregnancy. I threw a test in my cart at walgreens when buying some cold medicine and i bought a pack of one knowing it couldn't be positive
I took it the minute I got home and that positive sign popped up in two seconds flat. I went to the dr yesterday as well for a blood test and got it confirmed. I'm anywhere from 5-7 weeks. I have to go back to the ob clinic and set up an appt.
After taking the test instead of being excited. I cried. And when I looked at Gianna I cried even harder. She is my baby the love of my life and I feel like I'm jipping her of time spent with me. I def won't be able to nap and rest a lot during this pregnancy and the hubby will be gone July-November and then leave again in Jan for 6-9 months so it'll be just me with 2 under 2. And of course my paranoia and anxiety have set in and I'm worried that if something happens to me I'll leave Gianna behind
I know I'm not being very rational right now. I think once this all settles in I will feel better about the situation. And I know this is all according to God's plan so I just need to trust in that.
So yes baby number 2 is on the way!
Holy cow congratulations!!!! That is so exciting! It will all work out! And having them close together will be so fun for them in the future!
ReplyDeleteCongrats lady! I was the same way when I got pregnant, I cried, not tears of joy. Once the dust settles you will be so happy. I didn't think you could get pregnant while breastfeeding either, that is good to know!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations! I'll bet it was a total shock! I can't imagine finding out we're expecting number two so soon, but my SIL and BIL are having number two only 15 months after number one. I'm sure your sweet Gianna won't feel jipped. You guys are giving her a present: a younger sibling! That's really exciting because they'll be so close in age that they will be able to play with each other! I'm really happy for you and your family. :)
ReplyDeleteWell congrats! What a shock!
ReplyDeleteWow congratulations that is such a blessing! I know you have worries and that is natural but what you need to keep saying to yourself is exactly what you typed above and that is that God had other plans and He won't give you anything you aren't ready for.
ReplyDeleteCongrats!
ReplyDeleteCongrats!!! I think this is such a blessing and your children will be so close! :)
ReplyDeleteCongratulations!! I know you feel like your jipping your daughter, but your not! My sister and I are only 18 months apart, and my mom felt the same way. It will be harder on you than it is on her. She will be the best of friends with her brother or sister, and you'll wonder why you ever worried. Just keep reminding yourself of everything you just wrote. Congrats to your family!
ReplyDeleteWow! Congrats!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations! You will love seeing your sweet kids as siblings ... it's a beautiful sight.
ReplyDeleteI've found blogs off of your page, so you may already follow Brooke & Freeland their boys are closer than Gianna & Baby will be. Her husband is in Med school/residency, not the same as the military by a long shot, but still takes a lot of his time & attention. You might search her out.
ReplyDeleteMy husband & his brother are 14 months apart, and for the same reason (breast feeding) all will be ok!
You have the blog community for support too!!
Congrats! That's such great news! We are kind of in the same boat here. :) I got pregnant with my second (due in a few weeks) when my son was 9ish months old. I've worried about splitting attention and the upcoming deployment and two under two! Gah! It's overwhelming! But a friend posted this in my comments on one of my posts and I thought you might like it. :)
ReplyDeleteAs I hold your 2-year-old hand, basking in the glow of our magical
relationship, I suddenly feel a kick from within, as if to remind me that
our time alone is limited.
And I wonder: How could I ever love another child as I love you?
Then she is born, and I watch you.
I watch the pain you feel at having to share me,
as you've never shared me before.
I hear you telling me in your own way,
"Please love only me."
And I hear myself telling you in mine,
"I can't," knowing, in fact, that I never can again.
You cry. I cry with you.
I almost see our new baby as an intruder
on the precious relationship we once shared.
A relationship we can never quite have again.
But then, barely noticing, I find myself attached to that new being, and
feeling almost guilty.
I'm afraid to let you see me enjoying her.
-- as though I am betraying you.
But then I notice your resentment change,
first to curiosity, then to protectiveness,
finally to genuine affection.
More days pass, and we are settling into a new
routine.
The memory of days with just the two of us is fading fast.
But something else is replacing those wonderful times we shared, just we
two.
There are new times -- only now, we are three.
I watch the love between you grow, the way you look at each other, touch
each other.
I watch how she adores you -- as I have for so long.
I see how excited you are by each of her new accomplishments.
And I begin to realize that I haven't taken something from you, I've given
something to you.
I notice that I am no longer afraid to share my love openly with both of
you.
I find that my love for each of you is as different as you are, but equally
strong.
And my question is finally answered,
to my amazement..
Yes, I can love another child as much as I love you-- only differently.
And although I realize that you may have to share my time, I now know you'll
never share my love.
There's enough of that for both of you
-- you each have your own supply.
I love you -- both and I thank you both for blessing my life.
~author unknown
Did you cry? I totally cried. Too sweet. Best of luck to you!!!
Oh my gosh! congrats! I know you'll make it work just fine with both of them.
ReplyDeleteThough I'm not sure your next one will be as cute as Gianna is. I don't know if it's possible, b/c she's darn adorable!
Congratulations! I'm sure you're having all kinds of emotions just now, but my brother and I were only 18 months apart and I love having a sibling close in age. It will all work out!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations! I cannot imagine all the emotions you must be going through right now, but as you said obviously God had another plan for you and wanted you to have this baby now....Many blessings to all of you!
ReplyDeleteFirst, Congrats! Second, I totally get it. I get it all. My husband and I have girls that are 17 months apart. Right now I am living with a 20 month old and a 3 month while my husband is on his second deployment. Life is absoultely crazy, but I rely on the fact that God has a plan for everything. I tell myself this every single morning. Just like yourself I got pregnant with my second baby while I was breastfeeding my first. :) I felt guilty and like was shorting Emma, but now that Ava is here, it is exactly how it was supposed to be. Emma loves her, loves to try and make her smile and giggle. I can't imagine my life without these girls. I will say some prayers for you, I know they have helped me.
ReplyDeletefirst of all.. contratulations!! This is such a blessing, even though it may not totally feel like it right now. I completely understand how you are feeling about your first baby. But you are giving her and your next one such a gift. A lifelong best friend!
ReplyDeletecongrats!
ReplyDeleteCongrats!!! How exciting!!
ReplyDeleteCongrats!!!! :)
ReplyDeleteCongratulations!
ReplyDeleteoh my goodness- i think i can understand your mixed feelings. i would LOVE to try again for baby #2 but when i really think about it- i dont know if i am READY READY... but then again i can NOT wait to do it all over again! congrats on this journey and remember we are all here for you!
ReplyDeleteAww, congratulations!! I know my sister bawled like a baby when she found out she was pregnant with #2 (her first was 3 years old), because she swore she couldn't love another one as much. I think it's probably a natural thing (I haven't had kids, hence the probably :-)). But, she did end up with baby #3 when baby #2 was just 13 months old, so apparently spreading the love was not a problem! :-)
ReplyDelete