Monday, April 26, 2010

Empty

I just got home from dropping off Tank at the airport and let me tell you, I lost it. I was already a mess when I woke up this morning. Last night I decided to not put him in his kennel because I knew today he would be in it for the duration of both flights and a layover. I decided to camp out in the living room with my two dogs and Tank so that way if he needed to go outside we were right by the door. Tank slept until about 130am and then woke up to go outside. I then figured I should probably go to bed since today is my long work day. I put Tank in his kennel for about 10 minutes. He howled the whole time so I picked him up and carried him to bed with me. Tank was such a little cuddle bug. My other two dogs piled on the bed also and we all slept curled up together.

When Tank and I woke up this morning I think he knew something was up. Normally he can't wait to play with the big dogs and is full of energy. This morning he just laid in my bed and would let out a few little cries. This caused me to cry because I just felt awful about putting this poor little puppy on a plane.

I packed up his kennel, made sure it was secure and took it to the car. Normally he runs to the door and tries to come out with me but this morning he stayed put. The whole car ride to the airport he lay curled up in my lap. My friend J met me at the airport. I started blubbering like a baby as soon as we got out of the car. It didn't help matters that the woman behind the check in counter told us it's cruel and inhumane to ship a dog. I felt awful. Here this dog was abandoned, shuffled to four different homes and now has to board a flight to go to his 5th home. I felt like I was taking a baby and putting him on a flight with no supervision. I am terrified something will go wrong. that he will be scared that he will be traumatized for life.I know many people don't understand. But I've always been a softie for animals and get attached easily. We took Tank outside and fed him a little bit before putting him in his kennel. I bought him a special bone for the flight and he actually went into his kennel without a problem.It was awful leaving the airport, I cried the whole way home and know I won't be able to relax until I know he made it safely. I wanted so bad to keep him for myself but 3 dogs in an apt building is way too much, Especially with M being gone alot and an upcoming PCS.
What's funny is that my dogs are moping around too. My youngest dog refuses to eat or get out off my bed. She too is normally hyper in the morning and runs all over the place.

I don't know why I am taking this so hard. I know that it's just a puppy. That he will be ok and he's going to a good home. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that in the past month I've been to the airport three times and have had to say goodbye to someone. Then once again I return home to an empty house. I know I have my two dogs but they don't require alot of work. The puppy kept me busy which always helps when your hubby is deployed. I also can't cuddle with an 80 pound lab without being squished so it was nice to have a little puppy to cuddle with.

I am dreading going to work today and really just want to stay in bed all day and sleep. Ugh it's going to be a rough day

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11 comments:

  1. I totally would have cried too! But atleast you know he's going to a good home :)

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  2. I hope today gets better for you huni

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  3. Awww, I'm so sorry. I would be the same way too...puppies really do seem to act like humans sometimes. Hopefully he will just sleep the entire flight! At least you know he is going to a good home and will be loved and spoiled soon!

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  4. I hope your day perks up. At least you know Tank will be happy in his new home.

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  5. Aww. I hope you feel better. I would have cried too. I had to leave my cats with my best friend for the summer (I don't want o move them twice when it can be avoided), and I cried when I left them, and I miss them terribly ♥

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  6. Hope your day gets better...I have a soft spot for little puppies too...don't blame ya!

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  7. Aww lady, that's rough. And the woman who told you it was cruel to ship a dog, screw her! How else do people move across the country/overseas/etc... people ship their animals to keep them in their family! You were providing Tank with a loving family, it is a good thing.

    I hope you find some things to keep you occupied...

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  8. i'm SO sorry, i can TOTALLY relate to how you feel! i am SUCH an animal lover too!!! he'll be okay, please let us know that he got there safe!!! i'm so glad he'll be at a home that will love him forever!!!

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  9. If that lady doesn't think animals should fly, then why is she working at an airport!? I understand, I get attached to animals really fast as well. At least you know he is going to a good home.

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  10. Awe, I'm so sad for you. I hope today gets better.

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  11. What you did was NOT easy! Just think: with each trial comes a blessing! :)

    *hugs*

    tomorrow is a new day! take care, girl!

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