Tuesday, April 20, 2010

I'm Back!!

Hello everyone!!

You know it's been awhile since I have blogged when one of my blogger friends Tori messaged me on facebook today to tell me that I needed to blog hehe! Too be honest her and I were messaging each other about meeting up one day soon and she casually mentioned that I needed to blog. So here I am, finally sitting down at my computer and blogging.
And please keep my friend Tori in your thoughts and prayers as she just found out that her hubby will be deploying soon

I didn't mean to take a break from blogging. Last week the internet was messed up at my house and then when I finally got it fixed my mom came into town. She left yesterday and I meant to catch up with blogging then but I've been kinda bummed these last few days.

But I'm back and what I really want to discuss today is why men are so clueless!!!
Last week sunday, 4/11 was my two year wedding anniversary. M and I had decided to not get each other any big gifts but I was still waiting to see what he would send in the mail. He had mentioned previously that he was going to send me an exact replica of my wedding bouquet. So in the days leading up to and after my anniversary I waited for a bouquet of dark purple calla lilies to show up at my door. Never happened. Nor did I get a card or any other type of package. Now this didn't really bother me, I didn't really expect anything but a girl can hope right!!

All I was concerned about was that M got his packages for me. He had asked me to send him some toiletry items so I got a package together with the items he requested and I also made him an anniversary package. I got him some new books to read, a romantic anniversary card and all of his favorite snacks and candies. I mailed it about 6 days before our anniversary and was anxiously awaiting to hear that he had received it. He finally received the packages on the 15th. I was on the phone when he said he had picked them up. I could hear him opening the package and was waiting to hear a That card is so sweet, I feel the same way or something along those lines. Those words never came, Instead the first thing he said was Wow thanks for the soap and shampoo. So then I figured that he didn't receive the second package. I asked him if he had only received one or two and his response was oh yeah, thanks for the books. Seriously. I then asked if he received the card I sent, again his answer was not what I wanted to hear. It was, Babe I told you I received the packages, I got your card. Then he said it sounded like I had an attitude about something and he didn't want to argue. So I dropped the issue but when we hung up the phone I was pissed. At least I took the time and thought of something cute to send him on our anniversary. All I wanted was at least some acknowledgment about the package I sent him. Nope, too much to ask

So Friday morning when I woke up I was still very irritated. I grabbed my iphone and composed a very mature email that said this... When someone, aka your wife, sends you a package on your anniversary when you are deployed. It would be nice if you thanked her for the romantic card and stuff she sent you instead of getting more excited about shampoo. At least she thought of you on your anniversary.

I know, very mature. But hey, I was lonely, sad and upset about spending my anniversary alone. I understood that he couldn't send me anything but to not even say anything about the card and books really hurt my feelings. M apologized and said he was sorry for hurting my feelings and now we are fine but it did bother me for a few days.

I try to be strong all the time and to not get upset about the little things but some days it's hard and I let my emotions get the best of me and tend to overreact about certain things. But I'm learning

And speaking of overreacting, tomorrow I have a dr's appt. I hate dr's. Ever since I was little I would get so anxious when I had to go to the dr I would make myself sick. I still do to this day. I had a physical in January and set off the heart alarm monitor's because my heart was beating so fast and my bp was so high because I was so nervous. Unfortunately when I went for my physical I forgot to tell her I was on maxalt for my migraines. Well when I called to get my prescription refilled, she said I needed to come in for an appt. Hopefully I won't have to have blood drawn or have another exam done cause I am terrified of all that stuff. Wish me luck tomorrow y'all! Pray that I don't set off any monitor's!

Oh and one more confession, it is my fear of dr's and hospital's that is making me so afraid to get pregnant. How weird am I!!!



  1. Wow I feel very similar to you. I get mad all the time at things like that when my husband is deployed. Unfortunately I think I expect to much of him. Also, I avoid doctors like the plague. Especially at Ft. Bragg because it is so hard to get an appointment for anything. I am going to die when I ever have a baby and have to go do the doctors that much!

  2. Aww. Man, do you sound like me a year ago. It was Valentine's Day, though. Not as big of a deal, but nonetheless...if you work with COMPUTERS most of the time (he did in Iraq), how hard is it to go to 1800flowers.com and pretend you thought of me? I got nothing, and I flipped. "I'm here by myself, and all I wanted was a reminder you thought of me!" Then I felt selfish.

    Our anniversary he had down, if I recall. I got a dozen roses, and a $100 giftcard to a spa. But birthday...Valentine's Day...not so great.


  3. I hope your appt tomorrow goes well. {hugs}

  4. I'm guilty of getting upset like that too. I hate getting mad when he's deployed but it's hard to just turn off our emotions. At least everything is better now though. It must have been some awesome shampoo? Haha.

  5. Oh girl I know it is so frustrating! I always got mad about the little things too, but they don't even think about the little things! I kept hoping I would get flowers or something sent for my birthday or something, but nope. I did get a card, but still.... And I would send care packages that I really put thought into and he would forget to tell me he got them and when I would ask he would say, "Oh yeah I got it...thanks honey." Um...yeah, you're welcome! Ugh!

    Anyway, I know it's hard but you gotta think about what their day is like over there. He probably he as a lot of other things going on and a card is the least of his worries you know, I know it's still hard though. Glad things are all good with you!

    I've missed you...glad you're back! :)

  6. I know that they're completely different scenarios--- but my hubbs was in bootcamp over Valentine's Day last year and I sent him a card and pictures and felt exactly the same way when I got nothing back. I know he couldn't do anything about it, but I was upset for a few days.

  7. Oh man that's something my husband would do! ha He can be sweet and romantic, but at the same time completely clueless.
    Good luck tomorrow!!

  8. welcome back! sounds totally like my husband too. he has yet to tell me whether he's received a package I sent that has our baby shower video in it, when I know that he should have gotten it by now. when I ask about it in emails he forgets to answer that one specific questions. sometimes they're just so absorbed in what's going on over there that they just forget. i understand that, but it is annoying sometimes.

  9. I'm so glad you're back!! I missed you! I don't blame you for the anniversary thing.

    For Buck's and my 1st anniversary- it happened to fall on Mother's Day. We were broke, and he got me purple roses and daisies (fave!) and the sweetest card. As I read each line.. I was like oh mm gee, this suits us perfectly--- then the final line; you know where it typically says "Happy Anniversary"... mine said Happy Mother's Day.

    Ugh. I was like 'uhh... hello, I'm not a mother- what the...? ' and he says 'There was a line in the card aisle, and I didn't feel like fighting through it- so I just grabbed one on the end."

    Really? Seriously. lol... Men, we love 'em, right!

    Have a wonderful day, I'm glad you're back!!

  10. Men. Seriously. I'm sorry he was kind of a jerk about it. I've sent K countless packages. Half the time I got an "OH MY GOD! THANK YOU!" and half the time I got a "this weather here blows my roommate sucks and my back hurts, oh yeah, i got your box. thanks.

  11. I totally overreact to relatively small things since the hubby has deployed. It's just an emotionally stressful time! Sorry he was so insensitive, I'm sure that in his man brain he was thinking how awesome you are, just wasn't able to process it all at once :)

  12. Hey don't feel bad...I get butt hurt if my hubby is home and doesn't notice if I've bought something new for the house...LoL...and I go above and beyond being recognized when he's deployed: I want pics of him opening his surprise packages and looking overly happy...talk about neurotic right!!! Good luck at the dr.s!!!

  13. I have felt the same way many times. Men respond to things SO differently than we do. Even really sensitive men don't respond the way we would. It's hard not to get upset. Some men just show their feelings in other ways. Anyway, it is normal to feel that way, and especially with feeling lonely and everything. Oh and on the doctor thing, I was afraid too before I got pregnant and it really hasn't been that bad. Seriously!

  14. I've done that, too, only I set off the blood pressure alarm, not the heart rate one :) It was freaky. They finally had to take my blood pressure in my ankle to get a normal reading. Crazy!

  15. i can TOTALLY understand being upset about that, that is completely the way i would react. girls, we sure are emotional huh? but i think with good reason!

    you are too funny about the way you feel about docs offices and hospitals!!! good luck with your appt.!!!

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  17. You are going to have to get the book Love & Respect and read it and then send it to him. As men and women we are definitely cut out of a different cloth. We have to realize that they are as you said "clueless" to what we even think about. This book will help, of course you will cry your eyes out on the days that you realize that he does not understand you in any way, but you will also realize that we as women fall short too. It's a great read for both men and women! Hang in there. You are not the only one that has a toad sometimes, but he is your prince too!